The Unstable Atom

Reflecting over life through weird, crazy, ever changing, euphoric, absurd, confused and at times impartial lenses -a journey of curiosity and questions with my two alter egos.. as I try to fall out of the stagnation of instability.. or the desperate attempt to remain..

For days those hair bands were lying in the drawer.. I just kept holding on to them perhaps hoping that i would use or need them some day.. But two days back the fact suddenly struck me that i haven't used them since last 5 years or so! So promptly i picked them up and gave them away to some little kids who could actually use them!
I liked them and have used them earlier in life so some part of me thinks or perhaps hopes that i would use them again meaning i would go back to being my old self.. But that is not quite possible now owing to the time passed and all the experiences which make people different persons! How many of us hold on to old things sometimes just as a memory but other times hoping that we would use those things? They just lay around gathering dust and creating all sorts of negative energy..
Not only things but at times even some relationships.. specially the dysfunctional types.. Sometimes some grudges that we hold against people, or they hold against us.. Some times the things which are left unsaid undone.. These too gather dust.. We tend to just put things off, try to hold on to something which used to work at a certain point in time, but at times after a few years those things stop being the same way. We never stop to think why things are not working, we tend to ignore it and still hold on.. It gathers dust and creates all sorts of negative energies..
Its time to clear out the clutter! And that's exactly what i did. Not only cleaned out some more cupboards and drawers, but also tried to clear out some long standing grudges and dished out apologies.. Not sure if they will be accepted or not.. But i did my part.. At times even if you are not at fault it helps to apologize to erase out the grudge others have against you.. To ease their hurt can also help you de-clutter your own life! :)
So while i am at it, if anyone out there has anything against me please feel free to call up and give me a piece of your mind! It would help me as much as it would help you.. Thanks! :)

Its raining!! So heavily!
Crazy stupid rain.. feels like a part of my soul.. with all that pouring..
Idiots both him and me.. For the hard stubborn un-moving earth doesn't give a shit.
At the end of the day all my resolves all my decisions just dissolve..
When all the illusions of the day fade into the dark of the night..
The sounds that clutter my life all through the day, are silenced by the craving for the sound of your breath..
The rain washes over me.. and drains away all the colors from all the people, and the eyes that followed me today..
Waiting for your gaze..
Its something about this rain that brings all this out from the depths of my soul..
Perhaps its cause he lives within and shows outside..
I could watch, hear and feel him for hours.. untiring.. and a lifetime..
Perhaps many.... :)
Its something about my rain.. and his human form..

For the bull :)
From a water-dweller..

So writer's block is basically when you can't think of anything to write OR when you want to write about something but whatever you write seems unnecessary?!?!

Damn i think this is it then! then block.. need to find something to write about.. Some inspiration.. somehow nothing seems to be appealing to me these days.. So sort of dry drab sort of phase.. :S anyway hope to find something interesting soon....