The Unstable Atom

Reflecting over life through weird, crazy, ever changing, euphoric, absurd, confused and at times impartial lenses -a journey of curiosity and questions with my two alter egos.. as I try to fall out of the stagnation of instability.. or the desperate attempt to remain..

So, most of the times when we are sad about something or frustrated about not getting something, we are reminded of the good old anecdote of how a person was crying because he didn't have shoes until he saw someone who didn't have legs!

From this i guess we are supposed to understand or even believe that "compared" to other people our sorrows are smaller, and in doing so cease to feel sad or frustrated any more.

But, carrying ahead the celebrated example of shoes and legs, it fact remains that the guy does not have shoes! So if we still carried on observing this guy, assuming that we can, what will his next steps be? I could think of the following:

1) He watches the leg-less guy and feels really sorry for him, and them ashamed that he was crying for shoes. He then shuts up and carries on with life more happily knowing that he has legs (this reaction is what is expected from the person who has merited this story be told to me)

2) He watched the leg-less guy and feels really sorry for him, and he helps that guy out of his problem, and in doing so forgets that he doesn't have shoes (possibly the next preferred reaction?)

3) He watched the leg-less guy and feels really sorry for him, and he helps that guy out of his problem, however in doing so he doesn't forget about his problem but works relentlessly and with more vigor to attain his pair of shoes! (i personally prefer this one)

Out of the 1st 2, since the guy has ignored his problem of not having shoes, he will carry on walk barefoot. This would result in further injuries perhaps. Maybe wounds, which he won't be able to heal, since along the way he will see another person with a malady graver than his wounds and he will forget/ignore to tend to his own malady. Eventually, taking the extreme path, he might become leg-less too and in turn the inspiration for some other shoe-less person to become leg-less!

Now the question arises, how can two mutually different people be compared? How can the pain of one person be compared to that of another person who is in a completely different situation, basically a completely different person?!

It is indeed like comparing apples to oranges or anything else for that matter!

Only so that people stop cribbing or crying we tell them to look at other people's pain and forget their own? Instead of this if we empower them to solve the problem wouldn't it lead to a better situation a better life for everyone around?


Some people believe that ignoring a known problem will cause that problem to disappear.
Let us take the 2 examples
1) A scratch on the hand, to resemble smaller, trivial problems in life which possibly, let me emphasis "possibly" can take care of themselves- (i cannot think of any examples, but you can let me know if you have any)

2) A deep wound on the arm, to resemble bigger problems which possibly cannot take care of themselves- (like ego clashes, misunderstandings, severe ailment, actual wounds)

In this case, if we ignore the scratch, a light one- caused by your pet's nail by mistake, it will take care of itself, even if we don't put on any ointment. But does it really just take care of itself? Nope! The body does. For more information please google immunity system, white blood cells or whatever it is called scientifically.

Assuming that the scratch took care of itself, lets get to the deep wound of your arm- caused by a mad dog's bite! :S (oops!!)
What will happen if you ignore this one? pus, maggots, madness, gangrene?
Perhaps have to lose the arm completely. Or maybe if we still ignore it further, the arm will have to be cut.

So does ignoring a problem really solve it? or stop it from existing?

This was about physical wounds/problems etc. Now, we always say the mind is stronger than the body, the brain the heart is more important.
So, if we have something wrong with us in our thinking, conflicts, in our relationships, dysfunctional relations etc.. How much good would it do to anyone to ignore these problems?

Physical issues can be seen, cured.. But what about these mental/emotional things?
If no one can see or feel them but the person experiencing them? Sometimes it becomes so important and difficult that everyone around can also sense it! In this case what will the people around do? "Ignore" it and hope that the problem will solve?

Well its upon us to take a step back and think about what are values really are. And how will a problem solve itself?

I'm not sure how people can get on with the whole ignoring business without doing serious damage to themselves!! But to each their own. I hope whoever reads this can make their and other's life better by solving problems than ignoring them. Or who knows one day everything will be lost at the cost of ignoring, who knows maybe they have lost it already??

I'm leaving you
I don't know if I should
I prayed the moon
To see if she would
Let me be by you
She said she may
If I give her my soul
And I said no

I'm leaving you
I don't know if I should
I prayed the sun
To see if he would
Let me be by you
He said he may
If I give him my days
And I said no

I'm leaving you
I don't know if I should
I prayed the winds
To see if they would
Let me be by you
They said they may
If I never flew away
And I said no

I'm leaving you
And you know I'm not the one
To give up my heart
For the good of a man
Even by you
So tell me I should
Push me away
Don't make me stay
For I'm leaving you
And I still love you
Yeah I'm leaving you
And I still love you.

CP- now thats my girl!! :)
BP- hmm.. *swatting flies* whatever you say man

A hear that loves or the one that rejects?
Who loses?
The one who falls or the one who refuses to get up?
The one who strikes or the one who bears it? Not striking back knowing that blood wasted is wasted, yours or his..
Who loses then?
The one who chooses or the one who lets others choose?
The one who kills one self or the one who lives, thrives, fights and survives?
Who loses?
The one who is hurt or the one who hurts?

A moment to wonder? Who has lost? you or them? :)

I halt at the clearing, clutching my chest heaving for breath..
For a moment there is no one.. And then i see you..
You, standing there, surrounded by those gnarled trees, watching the last bits of this year's monsoon clouds swim lazily across tonight's pearly full moon..
Waiting..
A sight to behold.. For my eyes only.. not even your own..
And i know.. the wait is over.. :)

I guess this is how it feels to be at loss of words! And for me its a huge deal!! When no words or actions seem to make someone understand what you want to communicate.. When the same patterns are repeated like the wheel of a cycle.. When the same words need to be repeated, they lose their value and so does the person repeating them. Why do people let difficult situations get to them? Me being one of such "people".

Anyway been quite a while since i've written, as per my standards.. Words don't seem to sprout as they used to. Maybe there are so many thoughts that i can't find words to put them in. Maybe this is how it feels when you realise you are changing. You just withdraw deeper into yourself, like the trees in Narnia..

So i decided i needed some fresh inspiration.. A person, an incident, a place.. Lets see what stops by, or what i stop by! :) until then don't hold your breath ;) cause i might just come up with more "meaningless" ramble :) :)

In hunt for some fresh inspiration (apart from the rain, which seems to be pouring with a revenge, for obvious reasons!)

Its him,
your reflection perhaps,
or of the care that you so impeccably displayed.
Perhaps he's a shadow..
Like you now are..
Mere smokey grey skies..
Never the truth..