The Unstable Atom

Reflecting over life through weird, crazy, ever changing, euphoric, absurd, confused and at times impartial lenses -a journey of curiosity and questions with my two alter egos.. as I try to fall out of the stagnation of instability.. or the desperate attempt to remain..

My tea's grown cold
My eye's all sore
My heart churns out a mournful tune
I feel all alone but yet not lonely,
Cause somewhere in the corner of my heart, I know you still are there..
When will my sun shine on me again?
Can you please wipe the clouds of tears away?
Its the new year after all and everyone deserves another chance!
My words may sound empty
My face may tell you a lie
My eyes shall sparkle with you smile etched on them
You believed my fake words and I fail to understand how
Do you know naught of my love and do you know naught of my hurt?
I let go of the light now, but it still resides in my heart,
I put a blanket over it to keep it warm till my sun comes out again..
The end is near and so is the new beginning..
I shall pray that my sun will shine soon, wouldn't you?


- Prachi

(Personally i don't like this one much, not exactly how i wanted it to come out.. but nonetheless..)

Along came a spider, and wove his web around me,
I accepted it with all the greed i could gather.
Gently he serenaded me with his pincers..
The deadly weapons feel like soft feathers,
He wove the web and i was mesmerized..
He Cuddles n cares.. and is always there.
Is this a home where i feel so safe and so loved?
Or is this just a trap full of illusions, as it has been before?
Why cannot i see through things? or are things really as they seem from outside?
Along came a spider, and showed me real dreams..
He helps me know the difference between the two.. keeps me anchored and keeps me to himself, though unknowingly..
Emotions raging a fiasco, not knowing where to go and what to feel..
Though my spider appears to be stable, his clear eyes showing the way,
the misty feeling can be sensed even from beneath so many cloaks..
I feel lost and yet I'm sure.. Words fail me, as a plethora of emotions choke them!
Is this web the home he built for me? or is it god's trap yet again?
I feel safe n i feel loved, everything a bait could ask for..
so i shall stay put and wait for my spider to come back to me!
Along came a spider, and took my world by a storm..
Along came a spider, and wiped off all my past..
Along came a spider, and swept me off my feet, without intending to..
Along came a spider, i hope he stays back! :)

Broken and bruised..
I try to find myself in the girl who looks at me through the mirror..
Who is this known stranger, who glares at me and demands unknown answers?
With no spark in her eyes.. With no life..
Who snatched it away from her? Or was it she who threw it away?
In the hope to find solace, she made a pact with the devil himself..
Who is this girl staring at me?
And where is the carefree pure soul I'd once known to look at me and smile without any burdens?
Need to free the soul lying in a dark corner, from all the dark dirty shadows of the flimsy mis-leading world..
If only you would give me your hand. and tell me you would be there forever..
I would let go.. And I would hold on..
Tired of the changing identities.. Tired of the whole wide world..
Tired of the illusions of friendship.. Tired of the fake relations..
Tired of the pretexts to lure me in a trap.. to be a prey of the desires which would burn me down to ashes which scream out in pain..
For the un-erasable wounds on the soul..
For the unbelievable illusions of everything..
Please take me away from here..
You are the only bright light on the dark canvas of my life..
You are the golden drops on the dark threads of my dreaded nightmares..
Please take me away from this murky world.. Cover me in the tender sheets of your everlasting love..
Take me away.. Heal me.. Heal my wounds unseen, un-known, un-tended, un-cared for..
Take me with you, wherever you go, engulf me in yourself..
Cover me, and protect me from the big bad world.. help me find myself..
Help me re-ignite the spark.. Help me be me..
Find me my lost identity.. would you?

Can I be your firefly and brighten-up your world like u light up mine with a single smile? Would you like to take my hand and gather the colors which even the rainbow doesn’t have? Cause I will follow you wherever u lead me. I shall be your firefly whenever the dark clouds try to cover your smile. I shall always hold on. Would you like this firefly to be yours, if I promise my light won’t go off at the end of the night?